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How to fail

Meet Rob Mientjes, Professional Failure. Okay, not really. Nope. I wish it were, but I failed at that career.

It is nothing to be proud of, I know, but once realised, there is no simple way around it. Yesterday, at a concert, I misclapped twice. What that means is that I tried to applaud, but failed. The moment where my hands are supposed to collide and produce a noise, that moment, I messed it up. I failed at applause.

A week ago, I was drinking warm chocolate milk, which I had prepared myself successfully. Laid back in my chair, however, proved to be a tremendously stupid position to drink this. I nearly choked on my chocolate milk. I failed to drink chocolate milk successfully, another stunning failure.

Summing up failure can be a confronting activity. I am rather certain that this is, however, an activity you can fail at quite well. This is no complete list.

Sometimes, I also fail at speaking the truth. Some people call this lying. I call it storytelling. Welcome, dear reader. What is your favourite failure, and why?


  1. Epic fail!

  2. Hahaha!

    I’m pretty impressed you managed to get the cheering part wrong, considering the number of attempts you’re able to make :>

    Personally, I fail in bringing all the necessary equipment to the gym, resulting in me going commando back home, or using the fresh t-shirt for a towel... Pretty damn stupid, but true

  3. What about taking a 2 hour drive to bring something to a family member and at 1 hour and 59 minutes finding out you forgot to bring it along.

    Failing is a good process right? You learn something.

  4. I am weary of failure, I avoid it constantly like a ugly girl, except every now and then I get a little horny

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